April 24, 2006

The White Man Treadmill Dance

Morning Workout
30 minutes on the treadmill at Lactate Threshold pace (for me, that's 6.8 miles an hour which probably means nothing more than a number to you and, honestly, barely more than that for me either).

Random Comments: I have a fairly high tolerance for exercise-related pain. After years of ridiculously stupid, ritualistic mind-over-body training programs, I've turned into somebody with a lot of leg injuries but an ability to keep moving forward despite the pain. I'd imagine this talent would come in handy if, say, I were a prisoner of war at some sick type of health spa in the remote jungles of a country who's name I can't pronounce. That, however, isn't my reality. I'm a free man in Southern California who just likes to run, bike and swim, sometimes for longer distances than my body is naturally capable of. So you could imagine how easy this mornings 30 minute treadmill run would be for me and my hypothetically focused mind. Well, the tables have turned. This was one of the most excruciatingly painful runs I've had in a long time, perhaps ever. In fact, it was so painful, the 30 minute run took me 50 minutes to complete. After my usual 2 minute warm-up walk on the treadmill, I picked up the pace to begin my usual 8 minute warm-up jog. That lasted all of 20 seconds. Within those twenty seconds I was hobbling about on the treadmill like a stumbling, maniacal whacko who just walked across the Mojave desert with nothing more than a bottle of sun tan lotion and a pomegranate as my sole means for survival. I used all my energy to reach for the treadmill controls and slow down this death machine to a plodding, lethargic pace that was suitable for the sadly pain-filled state of my body. I continued walking and walking. Finally, after 20 minutes of this nonsense, I built up the energy reserves to get the treadmill moving at my Lactate Threshold pace. And somehow, someway, driven by some unknown force, I managed to make it through the 30 minutes of running. In, as previously mentioned, fifty minutes.

Star Spotting Of The Day: Jason Hervey, famously annoying older brother on that television classic, The Wonder Years

: Downtown Malibu

What He Was Doing
: Shuttling his two children into his sleek black Mercedes and, clearly maintaining character, being a bit annoying about the whole thing in an over-acting, white-man dancing sort of way.