February 02, 2006

A Balancing Act

Morning Workout
RUN... (treadmill)
Heart Rate Zone: 10 x 3 minutes at Steady State Threshold (Zone 4)

1500 meters

Random Comments: There's a critical balancing point in sickness. If you exercise before you hit that balancing point, when you are still just a bit too sick to be moving, then the effort you put out will body slam any opportunity you had for recovery. It'll bottom you out and you'll end up more sick than you were at your sickiest, most feverish, most nose runny peak. However, if you exercise right after you hit that balancing point, well, the workout actually helps you get better. It's really a miracle. It's tough to find that exact point though. I've spent years searching, years of trial and error, of exercising at various levels of fever and runny nose-ishness, to try and scientifically pinpoint that right moment. I'd love to say that I've figured out when I'm at that magical point. But I haven't. So when I went on my high intensity run this morning, I was pretty darn sure it would leave me a sickly, flu-ridden fool. I had to run though. I was willing to sacrifice my health for that run. Having finished the r
un, I figured I was doomed anyway, what the hell I might as well go for a swim in the cold pool too. If I'm goin' down, I'm goin' down strong. And so I did. I swam. Lo and behold, here I am approaching the early evening and I feel much better than I did yesterday. I've improved dramatically. I think I actually exercised the sick demons right out of me without even trying. I found the balancing point.

Every job has it's drawbacks; every company its flaws. Even the most ideal job isn't perfect. People aren't perfect and so, adhering to your basic laws of deduction, neither are the companies they create. Life, then, becomes a balancing act; balancing what we can accept and what we can't.

Everybody is looking for the things that make them happy. We are searching for the ideal, whatever that may represent for each of us. It's like the hypothetical carrot dangling from a string. And that carrot.... that carrot is the most beautiful, absolutely perfect carrot that ever existed. It is the most perfect, infinitely conical ideal that has ever been created. And that carrot is hanging off this string and it is dangling in front of you. Not just right in front of you, the carrot is dangling exactly three inches beyond your grasp. No matter how far you reach out, you can't grab hold of that carrot. And, believe me, you're really friggin hungry. You want that damn carrot. But here's the catch: you're never going to get it. You know why? Because there is no such thing as the ideal carrot. There is no such thing as perfection.

Whether it be our friends, our lovers, homesteads or ourselves, everything has flaws. Nothing is perfect. In fact, the only thing perfect is imperfection. (Stew on that for a second, Socrates.) And so what we need to do is figure out our own personal balance; what flaws are acceptable and what ones are not. With everything we do and everyone we meet, we are continually molding and defining that balance. Even in examining our careers, we must always balance the positive aspects from the negatives. If the positive column is much longer and more robust, well then, it sounds like things are going just fine. But it isn't always that clear cut. There's always that fine line between good and bad. And figuring out that critical balancing point - well, that's the key.

I'm not sure what the whole moral of this conversation is. I believe it has something to do with the color of my parachute. Though I'm not positive I know the actual color of my parachute - in fact, I think I left the parachute in the plane by mistake. I vaguely remember it was the color of a carrot. Then again, maybe it's better to be freefalling without it.


laura said...

very clever analogy.