September 27, 2006

Suicide Is Painless. And Press-Worthy.

Somewhere in my previous posts I had stated that, although I do not wish bodily harm on anybody, it would be in the best interest of football and, arguably, humanity, if Terrell Owens got injured early in the season and wasn't able to play ever again.

Now look what I've gone and done.
I didn't mean for it to go this far. Honest Injun.

Seriously, it was just an off-the-cuff comment, a random blog post. I mean, I'm not the one who broke his finger and forced him out of a few games. And then for him to start popping pills and trying to commit suicide? C'mon now, Terrell. You HAD to realize that I was just playin' when I commented on me hoping you were forced out of football. You gotta learn to not take it all so seriously, y'big baby.

Speaking of seriously, although I do not wish suicide attempts on anybody, Terrell Owens' recent attempt just further proves he is a buffoon. Every moment of the guys pro-football career has been focused on generating publicity for himself. He's a showman; an egomaniac of the highest degree. As talked about in my previous The "I" in "Team" post, Terrell Owens acts more like a three year old than my three year old neice. Dare I say that this recent suicide attempt is another fine example of it all.

Terrell does not breathe oxygen - he breathes attention. And when he is sitting at home with a broken finger, unable to play, the attention turns away from T.O. and on to the game of football, where it should be in the first place. By attempting suicide, T.O. wins again. As I'm sure he expected, the guy has once again become the headline on every news channel and soon to be every newspaper in the country. And that's not even to mention the wasted space on blogs like mine with postings like this. Once again, it is no longer about football, it is about T.O.

Don't get me wrong, I've got nothing against a big ego. For better or worse, big egos are part of sports and oftentimes a part of success. But I'll take Lance Armstrong's ego over Terrell Owens any day. At least Lance Armstrong doesn't spend his life screaming and crying for attention. At least Lance Armstrong doesn't laugh and spit in the face of his opponents upon winning a race. There's ego and there's class. Lance has got both. Terrell Owens is seriously, dramatically class deficient.

The best thing that could happen to us all is if T.O. tried to commit suicide and nobody paid attention. Let's all turn our collective backs on his non-stop tantrums.

As I said before, I don't wish suicide on anybody - and if the guy is really depressed, he needs to see a psychiatrist and take care of his damn self - but maybe this will be a kick in our mutual pants to remove the T.O. parasite from football altogether. Sports will be better off without him.


j. said...

Terrell Owens just had a press conference where he announced, in a very professional manner, that he didn't try to commit suicide. Instead, he had an allergic reaction to some pain killers he was taking for his broken finger.

He apologized to his team, his family and all fans for the disturbance and for taking attention away from playing football.

So in relation to all the stuff I wrote above here....well....umm......uh.... never mind.