This Is What It's Like In Heaven

I opened my eyes just moments before the sun blanketed the land in it's warm morning rays. I lay still in the dimming darkness. Slowly and quietly I embraced the peace and tranquility.

As serenity encircled me, I began to hear the chirps and cheeps that mark the start of a beautiful new day (from the alarm clock). Soon enough the light (of the bedside table) immersed the room in it's splendor. I sat, stood, smiled and stretched my arms. I was grateful to be here, to be now.

I walked outside the bedroom and was greeted by the sprinkling patter of a distant waterfall (Catherine peeing in the bathroom). Ah, the limitless joy of the sounds of nature in paradise.

We decided to go for a swim this morning and, in anticipation, prepared ourselves for the exciting journey. We feasted on fruits and herbs (Quaker Oats instant oatmeal) and rehydrated ourselves from nature's ultimate replenishment (English Breakfast tea).

I glanced out the window to an endless sea of God's green earth (plants and weeds that had overrun the patio) and reveled in my excitement to be alive. Soon enough we finished gathering our swim gear and headed towards the water.

We mounted our horses (a Toyota with about 5 horsepower) and galloped to our destination as the music of the morning (KISS FM, all R&B all the time) whistled in our ears.

The swim was angelic. The water was so clear you could see the bottom (of the pool). I splashed and played and went back and forth in endless succession (it's only a 25 yard pool). I could barely refrain from laughing and smiling (actually, grimacing). I heard the clicking of dolphins frolicking from afar (the jewelry of the old lady in the far lane) and decided to float on my back and soak in the serenity of the moment (3x 75 backstroke with 15 seconds rest).

After what seemed like only a few minutes (2400 yards), we emerged from the water, enlivened and refreshed. I walked away and as I dried my body, found myself standing amidst a plethora of penguin (the design on my underwear) who seemed to embrace me (from the elastic of the underwear) as if they were a part of me (it is my underwear, after all).

Though still early, it was already a fantastic morning. And as I emerged from my beach-side abode (the men's locker room), I turned back to gaze once more across the watery expanse (of the YMCA pool). Lo and behold, a whale emerged on the horizon (actually, just a really fat old guy) to greet me and welcome me to another wonderful day in paradise. And I couldn't help but think, this is what it must be like to be in heaven.