August 22, 2006

It's All So Very Sketchy...

I'm sitting at a chair in Starbucks right now. There's a guy in the chair next to me who is clearly an artist. It's really the drawing pad and the charcoal on his lap that gave it away. (You can call me Sherlock Holmes, if you like. I don't mind.) I think he's drawing me. That is to say, I recently noticed that he keeps looking over at me every minute or so, then goes back to his drawing pad. Then looks at me again, and back to the drawing pad. Dead giveaway, really.

So I'm sitting here, all of the sudden feeling a bit self-conscious, and wondering what the hell the common protocol is for when you think somebody is drawing you. Do I just lean over and say, Excuse me, sir, are you perhaps drawing me? That seems a bit awkward. Maybe I can casually try to walk around and glance over his shoulder. Though since his back is against the wall, that could prove to be quite a bit difficult without a jackhammer and some sort of drywall remover. Perhaps if I give him a good swift kick in the shins, he'll double over and I can peak a glance.

Such dilemmas.

But all of that won't really answer the most important question of why he would be drawing me. Do I really look that unique? Are my features that grotesque? If he is in fact drawing me and I think it's ugly, shouldn't I be allowed to take the drawing away from him? I mean, wouldn't it only be natural for me to own the rights to my own image. Perhaps if he says that he is, in fact, drawing me, I should tell him to stop immediately until I call up my attorney and get a release form drafted up for his signature.

Maybe I'll just sit here and start constantly shifting in my seat, thereby screwing up his drawing. Want me to pose for you Mister Replicate-My-Image-Without-My-Permission Guy?! Well how would you like it if I moved my arm HERE!! And maybe now I'll drape my leg over THIS! How's that drawing coming along now?!

Oh wait.... he's not looking at me anymore.
Never mind.